Weekend with A was actually very successful! Here is a rundown of our Tolkien approved, Ke$ha insprired weekend :
Friday :
A arrives after a ridiculous wind storm. Too intense for words. I thought I was going to blow away. I show her the apartment and fill her in on my confusions with the whole G situation and we catch up until we have dinner with W and I at Red Lobster! I got shrimp linguini alfredo. It was DELISH! and those biscuits. Gurll I could eat 'em by the bushel. Someone the subject of "Things that make Nicky gag" came up over dinner, and I proceeded to, but that's alright. Cheddar biscuits make everything better. I also got the opportunity to take an awesome Lost picture. It was beyond epic.
That night we went back to my apartment and started playing with Microsoft Anna and leaving people voicemails. Hilarious. some of our best?
"Sometimes when I'm alone I touch myself and pretend it casper the friendly ghost molesting me."
"I love the feel of nice cool saxphone between my firy loins in the morning sunlight. It drives me to the point of physical exhaustion. oh. yeah. yeah. so cold. i'm cumming"
"I will never forget the night i woke up and you were molesting me. Never before have i so enjoyed being forcefully penetrated by another man."
all in all, a success :)
Saturday :
Went to Happy Badger because it's an awesome little store and I knew A would enjoy it. Talked to the lady there and she was so funny. Talking about how she framed a card she owns in her shop of some tree people as a gift to the trees in her front yard. Such a little hippie. Also found out they did Tarot readings so we scheduled readings for Sunday.
Then I took her to KA Kart to meet the boys without really meeting them. She got introduced by there wasn't enough time for people to really communicate and hate each other. Perfect!
Then we went to this antique mall in Maumee that I had wanted to go to. It was HUGE and had lots of entertaining things. One of them being a vintage embalming machine. Nasty. lol and some really creepy looking dolls. Had lunch at Cracker Barrel (a.k.a. Chicken Boquet) and it was both delicious, an insanely large amount of food, and dirt cheap. Possibly my new favorite restaurant. So good!!! We also had Logan as a server. He was tall. And cute. Bonus!
Then we went to Target, and walked out with nothing! That deserves a prize.
After that we went to WalMart to pick up materials for dying eggs! I also scored an ah - mazing bra. Forril, I'm in love. Then we rented the Godfather - turned out to be a really good movie! Who knew!
We decided we wanted to have Ke$ha inspired eggs, so we found an awesome kit that totally made our dreams come true.
Sunday:
Went to go get our tarot cards read, found out it costs 20 bucks for 15 minutes!! we decided to escape through the cafe entrance instead. it was awesome.
Then we went on a little nature walk with the roomie :). We discussed childhood memories, and it brought about many scaring youtube videos later. Most notably: the letter people, Mr. N. Look it up if you dare.
So then finally the night when we go to see G's band. First we have lunch with AfC, R and finally meet D. We have a good time and everyone seems to hit it off. Then we go to downtown to have a beer before going to the venue. G's band plays and they were really impressive! They sounded really good and I like their music a lot. AND I got to talk to him. Seemed highly successful. AND HE'S NOT SHORTER THAN ME. i think i wept tears of joy. we are seriously like almost the exact same height, A said he's like a centimeter or so taller. Huzzah!!
HOWEVER. Everytime i start talking to G for awhile, AfC pulls me away and tells me he doesn't think it's a good idea, and he believe that G would cheat which I honestly would never ever imagine. uggh. Granted I don't know where AfC's agenda is. Even though he has a girlfriend i know he likes me...so maybe that has something to do with it?
I HATE THIS GAME.
either way, G is coming up may 6th again. we'll see what happens.
Showing posts with label woe is me. Show all posts
Showing posts with label woe is me. Show all posts
Friday, April 22, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Blast.
I thought I had DVDFAB on my computer. Turns out it was just the icon, and I don't have the program.
But I already bought 20 bucks worth of blank DVDs. :(
I guess I'll just return them.
That's what I get for not inspecting further....
But I already bought 20 bucks worth of blank DVDs. :(
I guess I'll just return them.
That's what I get for not inspecting further....
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Ooooooooo
O. Chem may just be the death of me. For no other reason than I DESPISE the lab. For some unknown reason I just dread going to it! Even though I'm not all that awful at it. oh well, only a couple more months!!!
My friend is dj-ing the bg radio station right now! it's kind of exciting! Also, this season of American Idol is really pulling me in...I'm going to blame Stephen Tyler. Also, the Threat Level Midnight episode of The Office may just be the greatest thing they have ever done, and that's saying something!
xoxo
it's starting to get warmer!!!! yay!!!!
Edit: I came, I saw, I conquered that O. Chem lab.
Kind of. There may have been a hydrochloric acid incident.
My friend is dj-ing the bg radio station right now! it's kind of exciting! Also, this season of American Idol is really pulling me in...I'm going to blame Stephen Tyler. Also, the Threat Level Midnight episode of The Office may just be the greatest thing they have ever done, and that's saying something!
xoxo
it's starting to get warmer!!!! yay!!!!
Edit: I came, I saw, I conquered that O. Chem lab.
Kind of. There may have been a hydrochloric acid incident.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Time is a funny funny thing
Wow. I can't believe it's been sooooo long since my last post I mean I know I updated about moving into the apartment but my entire summer went undocumented...So so soooo much has changed. But at the same time the cycles are still the same. Especially this summer I wish I would have taken more time to write down what I was feeling/doing. Obviously I've started a new semester at school and it feels pretty crazy to be a junior now. I'm an upperclassman?! What the WHAT?! I feel like the closer it comes down to my last couple semesters the more scared I get. What am I going to do after college? I feel like I need to go to grad school...do internships...get lab research under my belt. Something! The classes, as frustrating as they can be, are still a safety net for me. I don't know what I'll do when they stop...But I still have some time to try to figure things out :)I think I might try and meet with my advisor.... oof ::begin stress buildup:: lol I guess I just feel like there is some sort of countdown running until I have to become a full fledged "adult" and I don't think that I am quite ready for that yet...
I guess there's a lot that needs to be caught up....
I ended up working for my AM this summer which was a super, massive, enormous blessing. I honestly don't know what I would have done had she not been able to fit me in! THANK JEBUS!! I was working on a "special project" for the company that sshe works for and it was pretty easy and straightforward. Huzzah for that!
Overall though this summer was pretty....awful. But I'm glad it happened! It was...a good kind of awful (yes, that does make sense...in my head at least). Not too long after that last post before summer my AN who has breast cancer started getting pretty bad. She was diagnosed in 2004 with stage 4 and beat it for a long time and was in remission for awhile. Unfortunately it came back and spread to her brain....After that I guess there wasn't a whole lot that could be done. I remember the last time I saw her... It was at my cousins (her daughters) graduation party from college (for her masters) and she seemed so tired and weak and fragile. I'd never seen her in that condition before, even when she was in the midst of her worst treatments from her first bout. I could tell then that this was a different kind of battle. I guess you never really think that when you see someone or say goodbye it could be for the last time. I remember I gave her a kiss and hug and told her to get some sleep and rest (she may have taken my advice a little to literally >.>) (I know that's awful but humor is how I cope.)
July 2 she passed. It's a shame you never realize how much you love or appreciate someone until they're gone. I don't even know if there are words to describe how I felt. A couple nights earlier the hospital had called to tell us to come down and say our goodbyes because she probable didn't have much longer. It was on a Tuesday night so my parents wouldn't let me go because I had to work the next day and they didn't want me to see her like that. I don't know if I've ever cried that hard before in my life. The feeling of emptiness and helplessness overtook every fiber of my being. A feeling I would never wish on my worst enemy. She was 53.
I'm pretty sure I cried more that week than I have in my entire life combined. The wake was...hard to say the least. I remember the drive to the funeral home. The nauseous feeling in my stomach. Walking into the room and the minute that I passed the threshold tears started pouring from my eyes...Seeing my UM, CA, CH...It was too much. I remember the way UM (her husband) said "It's alright...she's better now.." something about the way he said it sounded so sincere, and it resonated through my mind the rest of the night. I feel like in every family there is one person who is a particularly strong driving force in keeping the family close. This person in my family was my AN. All the parties were over her house...she did a lot of planning ect. Nothing about the situtaion seemed fair.
She never got to see her children have grandkids, or get married. She became that person in old photographs that people ask about and you say they died young from cancer. Not only me but all my cousins and her children have to leave most of there life without knowing her/having her there. Just become a collection of memories.
I feel like funerals are a good portrait into families though, and even though the circumstances were awful it just made me realize how much I appreciate and love everyone in my family. I loved catching little moments and interactions between family members that I don't think I'll forget and will cherish for a great while.
I've learned a lot about who I am/where I want to be/what I want to do from this though. and I've questioned a lot of what I was doing before...
Why do I go out of my way so much to make people happy and appeasing others when it doesn't make me happy. Do things I don't want to do because they want to or stray from things I desire because they don't.
Why do I keep holdign on to relationships with old friends who's time has long past, making me miserable at times?
Why don't I just do what I want to do?When I want to do it.
On top of all of that dealing with my mother's mental disorders has been physically and mentally exhausting. I just don't know what to do and hate the fact that I don't even feel like I know her....I also hate the fact that the more I learn about it, the more I find myself thinking sometimes that I would just rather be without her for awhile.
I love my mother. to bits adn pieces. but she needs help and is unwilling to do anything about it....I don't want to go into too much detail here but I remember dreading the ride home from work everyday....
So this post was long and rambling and sad but I guess I felt I had to get it out of the way before I could get to the fun stuff again :). I will not let anything hold me down. What doesn't kill you make you stronger (holler!)
I guess there's a lot that needs to be caught up....
I ended up working for my AM this summer which was a super, massive, enormous blessing. I honestly don't know what I would have done had she not been able to fit me in! THANK JEBUS!! I was working on a "special project" for the company that sshe works for and it was pretty easy and straightforward. Huzzah for that!
Overall though this summer was pretty....awful. But I'm glad it happened! It was...a good kind of awful (yes, that does make sense...in my head at least). Not too long after that last post before summer my AN who has breast cancer started getting pretty bad. She was diagnosed in 2004 with stage 4 and beat it for a long time and was in remission for awhile. Unfortunately it came back and spread to her brain....After that I guess there wasn't a whole lot that could be done. I remember the last time I saw her... It was at my cousins (her daughters) graduation party from college (for her masters) and she seemed so tired and weak and fragile. I'd never seen her in that condition before, even when she was in the midst of her worst treatments from her first bout. I could tell then that this was a different kind of battle. I guess you never really think that when you see someone or say goodbye it could be for the last time. I remember I gave her a kiss and hug and told her to get some sleep and rest (she may have taken my advice a little to literally >.>) (I know that's awful but humor is how I cope.)
July 2 she passed. It's a shame you never realize how much you love or appreciate someone until they're gone. I don't even know if there are words to describe how I felt. A couple nights earlier the hospital had called to tell us to come down and say our goodbyes because she probable didn't have much longer. It was on a Tuesday night so my parents wouldn't let me go because I had to work the next day and they didn't want me to see her like that. I don't know if I've ever cried that hard before in my life. The feeling of emptiness and helplessness overtook every fiber of my being. A feeling I would never wish on my worst enemy. She was 53.
I'm pretty sure I cried more that week than I have in my entire life combined. The wake was...hard to say the least. I remember the drive to the funeral home. The nauseous feeling in my stomach. Walking into the room and the minute that I passed the threshold tears started pouring from my eyes...Seeing my UM, CA, CH...It was too much. I remember the way UM (her husband) said "It's alright...she's better now.." something about the way he said it sounded so sincere, and it resonated through my mind the rest of the night. I feel like in every family there is one person who is a particularly strong driving force in keeping the family close. This person in my family was my AN. All the parties were over her house...she did a lot of planning ect. Nothing about the situtaion seemed fair.
She never got to see her children have grandkids, or get married. She became that person in old photographs that people ask about and you say they died young from cancer. Not only me but all my cousins and her children have to leave most of there life without knowing her/having her there. Just become a collection of memories.
I feel like funerals are a good portrait into families though, and even though the circumstances were awful it just made me realize how much I appreciate and love everyone in my family. I loved catching little moments and interactions between family members that I don't think I'll forget and will cherish for a great while.
I've learned a lot about who I am/where I want to be/what I want to do from this though. and I've questioned a lot of what I was doing before...
Why do I go out of my way so much to make people happy and appeasing others when it doesn't make me happy. Do things I don't want to do because they want to or stray from things I desire because they don't.
Why do I keep holdign on to relationships with old friends who's time has long past, making me miserable at times?
Why don't I just do what I want to do?When I want to do it.
On top of all of that dealing with my mother's mental disorders has been physically and mentally exhausting. I just don't know what to do and hate the fact that I don't even feel like I know her....I also hate the fact that the more I learn about it, the more I find myself thinking sometimes that I would just rather be without her for awhile.
I love my mother. to bits adn pieces. but she needs help and is unwilling to do anything about it....I don't want to go into too much detail here but I remember dreading the ride home from work everyday....
So this post was long and rambling and sad but I guess I felt I had to get it out of the way before I could get to the fun stuff again :). I will not let anything hold me down. What doesn't kill you make you stronger (holler!)
Friday, May 7, 2010
These are the days it never rains but it poors...
These past couple of days have been rough with a capital R. I'm so unbelieveably stressed/frustrated/unsure about everything I could scream. I found out my work doesn't need me back this summer. So as of right now I am unemployed. This might quite possibly be the worst feeling in the world. I mean...i have apartment payments to make next semester at school. I have to buy food. I need to get a car to GET to school and/or come home at all to visit. I need to pay for gas. HOW IS ANY OF THIS GOING TO HAPPEN?! I'm going out tomorrow to apply to as many places as possible.
I don't even want to think about it right now, I feel like I'm drowning.:( But I don't want to be a Debbie Downer. Life moves on and everything happens for a reason.
There are some pretty bad storms rollin' in right now, but the CAVS are on tv so that makes things better!
Cleveland is the reason!!! Goooooooo Cavs!!! :D
I get to visit my family on Sunday for Mother's Day! I'm pretty excited. Going over my AL for steaks! yumm
p.s. LOST this week wasINSANE. seriously best show on television. and the Glee I know and love is back! This week's epi was the first one I felt was like the old ones and I loved it!
AND my dad made bbq chicken on the grill tonight. I mean really, I shouldn't complain as much as I do, life is pretty great sometimes even when it's trying to overtake you.
I don't even want to think about it right now, I feel like I'm drowning.:( But I don't want to be a Debbie Downer. Life moves on and everything happens for a reason.
There are some pretty bad storms rollin' in right now, but the CAVS are on tv so that makes things better!
Cleveland is the reason!!! Goooooooo Cavs!!! :D
I get to visit my family on Sunday for Mother's Day! I'm pretty excited. Going over my AL for steaks! yumm
p.s. LOST this week wasINSANE. seriously best show on television. and the Glee I know and love is back! This week's epi was the first one I felt was like the old ones and I loved it!
AND my dad made bbq chicken on the grill tonight. I mean really, I shouldn't complain as much as I do, life is pretty great sometimes even when it's trying to overtake you.
Monday, April 19, 2010
I think I jinxed myself
This day has been awful. :( I lost my school I.D. card and haven't eaten in over twelve hours. Need omm in my tummmyy or else the grumps come and get me. It's all good though, I have this take home test to accomplish tonight to cheer me up! .
sorry for being a debbie downer. I just want it to be Thursday when life will be splendid again.
and I didn't get my animal phys. take home test completed. :( gonna have some loooooooongs nights ahead of me.
AND i have to pay 30 bucks to get a replacement I.D. When it rains, it pours my lovelies. Just gotta keep a smile on my face and realize that the end of the schoolyear is right around the corner! I can see a light at the end of this very dark tunnel indeed!
sorry for being a debbie downer. I just want it to be Thursday when life will be splendid again.
and I didn't get my animal phys. take home test completed. :( gonna have some loooooooongs nights ahead of me.
AND i have to pay 30 bucks to get a replacement I.D. When it rains, it pours my lovelies. Just gotta keep a smile on my face and realize that the end of the schoolyear is right around the corner! I can see a light at the end of this very dark tunnel indeed!
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Saturday, February 20, 2010
So long...farewell...auf wiedersehen...goodbye
Today is a sad sad day for me. A day of realization. One of my absolute favorite pairs of jeans...must bite the dust. I've had them since about 6/7th grade and even though I've been neglecting them and haven't worn them in a good couple months I still never even thought to get rid of them. So yesterday I decided that I'd give them a little joy ride and opted to wear them. This pretty much sealed the deal for them. One pant leg has a tear that reaches all the way to about mid/upper calf which I had mended with some safety pins and all but 2 or 3 of the belt loops have come out. The pants are already a couple sizes too large now so a belt really is necessary and it just looked...bad. So I gave them one last breath of fresh air...and then had to throw them out.
I bought a new pair of brown cords over the summer but they are also a little too big and just weren't the same. So the hunt presses on.
So long old friend. I hope there's a pant heaven that you can frollick through ;]
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Waiting for Class...
Waiting to head out to class and feeling a little gloomy. I can feel some of the friendships I have here starting to fray at the seems which is never really a good feeling. However, everytime I start to feel this way and start getting a little down in the dumps something happens to change it and I realize I'm making too big of a deal out of nothing...Fingers crossed that this happens again. I love everyone I've met here and to lose them would be heartbraking and devastating. Oof, anyway hope to have some fun posts up soon to get me out of this slump!
p.s. I am determined to get my FAFAS done ASAP this year!!! No waiting till the last minute like last time!
EDIT: and I'm already in a better mood! I just called my bank to see how much money I have and It turns out that I have a lot more than I thought at the moment!
EDIT EDIT: I told you this always happens!I don't know why I question some of my friendships so much. Whenever we do hang out we're totally fine and cool. Which is how I am with most of my friends. I don't know why I have to overanalyze every detail with this one friend in particular. oof!
I got to see cute boy today, but we just smiled and waved at each other. I wish I could talk to him. That is my goal for this week. Strike conversation. Make him fall in love. ;]
p.s. I am determined to get my FAFAS done ASAP this year!!! No waiting till the last minute like last time!
EDIT: and I'm already in a better mood! I just called my bank to see how much money I have and It turns out that I have a lot more than I thought at the moment!
EDIT EDIT: I told you this always happens!I don't know why I question some of my friendships so much. Whenever we do hang out we're totally fine and cool. Which is how I am with most of my friends. I don't know why I have to overanalyze every detail with this one friend in particular. oof!
I got to see cute boy today, but we just smiled and waved at each other. I wish I could talk to him. That is my goal for this week. Strike conversation. Make him fall in love. ;]
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